It's late and I should be folding and putting away laundry. I've decided to blog instead. This post title used to be, Little Bits of Randomness. Then I poured out writing like a fast, moving, broken dam. So I changed the title. Forgive my rambling ways.
*My babies are all fast asleep in their beds (well my bed, really). The girls are doing swim team and Owen has swim lessons. They swim in our little pool on the patio at least 3 times a day. They are exhausted and sound asleep even before the summer sun goes down.
*Robert has been in Wisconsin since Sunday. Tonight he told me he missed me and when I told him I loved him, he said he loved me more. I was surprised. I feel all I do is complain to him...about everything. Why do I do that? I vent to him too much. I guess I want him to feel my PAIN of being home alone without him. Maybe he doesn't mind my feeble attempts of sympathy. He loves me more....somehow I doubt that.
*I am sick. It makes taking care of the kids all by myself a bit hard at times. I feel I haven't been as patient as I should be. I wonder if my kids think I am crazy....sometimes nice mom, other times...not so nice. It's the first week of summer and they're fighting more than I think they should be. I'm trying to create good days and memories, but at moments, I'm NOT succeeding.
*I have good friends. My kids have played at their houses (giving me little breaks to run get groceries without them) and they have had us over for dinner. Oh, thank you.....really, thank you!
*My dad turned 61 on Monday. I wonder if he'll ever know what his life and example has meant to me....everything.
*I haven't run all week. It feels strange. I realize what a big part of my life running has become. I need it. It is my outlet, my one hobby, my RELEASE. I was snuggled on the couch with Owen watching his sweet movie he picked out at the library (The kids all got their own cards today. We checked out like a million books and movies. I haven't had a late fee in months. Can we keep it up all summer long? When I told Bob about the kid's cards he just moaned. Late fees! Late fees! Late fees....was all he could think of.) I was really snoozing. Avery ignored my napping attempt and woke me, pleading for me to put the Garmin on her wrist. "No, it isn't a toy," I told her. "Go put it away." "But mom, I really need it. I am going to go out and run around the yard a lot, so I really need it mom, please." This made me laugh.
*Bob's big race is Saturday. Poor him, he's out of town and sick like me. I hope he's better soon. I am excited for him. He has worked hard for 6 months to finish this 1/2 Ironman. It's pretty much consumed his life. I will admit, I have had a few melt downs. So, has he. There was a day or two that he was serious about quitting. He just didn't want to spend any more time away from us, he said. I don't know that I believed that one. It was sweet, but I think he was just plumb worn out from the new job and all the training. I can't wait for Saturday, to cheer him to the finish...I really am SO proud of him, but more so....I want my husband back.
*Chanel...we have a love/hate relationship. I love her when she snuggles by me and lays so quietly on my lap. I hate it when she escapes from the yard and I arrive home to see the neighbor left a note on my kitchen counter telling me he found her in the street. That's all fine and dandy.....but my house? It looked like a nuclear bomb went off. I was so not ready for company.
*I need to go to bed. Chanel will be up before 6 whining for me to let her out. I don't want to go to sleep. I know I'll be up half the night thinking I hear a burglar breaking in to bring to life my worst nightmare. I'll be going over scenarios and escape routes in my head all night. When I am sleeping soundly, it won't last long. Owen will kick me in the head, or Payton will talk in her sleep. Yes, when dad's gone, we all sleep together. Well, except Avery. I move her into her own bed before I go down. She is newly out of pull-ups, so there are often accidents. It ain't happening in my bed. That's just that.
*I am looking forward to the weekend, Bob's big race, Beckham's baby blessing, Aunt Kris's surprise party, seeing Danette and Keion, and Shon and Jen......then staying with the kids a few more days in Pocatello where we can play with family and friends and I can take my kids to all my favorite summer spots. Pocatello was a fabulous place to grow up. I snubbed it for many years, now as an adult, I have reconnected with all the reasons I love it and have enjoyed sharing them with my kids. I attribute my love for it mostly because of the love I have for the people there. Many are gone, some are still there, but some of the best people I've had in my life, have been a part of my past in, Pocatello.
*Here's to good memories and especially....... sweet dreams!
